Handling Challenging Behaviors with Confidence: A Guide for Early Childhood Educators
If you work with young children, you know that challenging behaviors are not a matter of if, but when. Biting, tantrums, running away, refusing to participate, or struggling during transitions can leave even the most experienced educators feeling overwhelmed.
First, let’s say this clearly: challenging behavior does not mean you are doing a poor job. Behavior is communication, and every child is still learning how to express their big feelings in this big world. With the right tools and support, challenging moments can become powerful opportunities for growth; for both children and educators.
Understanding the “Why” Behind Behavior💡
Before we can change behavior, we need to understand it. Young children often act out when they:
Don’t yet have the words for their feelings
Are overwhelmed by noise, crowds, or activity
Are tired, hungry, or overstimulated
Are navigating a new developmental stage
Are struggling with transitions
Instead of asking, “How do I stop this behavior?” try asking, “What is this child trying to tell me?”
Observing patterns, when behaviors happen, during which activities, and with which triggers, can reveal helpful clues and guide your response. If you have particular students who need extra support, try keeping a log like this to better plan for next steps.
Proactive Strategies That Prevent Many Behaviors🌱
Many challenging behaviors can be reduced with strong preventive practices:
✔ Predictable routines
Children feel safer and more secure when they know what comes next. Visual schedules can be especially helpful. Use time warnings, even if they can’t tell time (5 min, 2 min, Clean-up).
✔ Clear expectations
Teach classroom rules through modeling and repetition, not just reminders after something goes wrong. These can be reviewed before each activity, like how they walk in the halls or how they clean a station to move to the next.
✔ Developmentally appropriate activities
When children are engaged and challenged appropriately, they are less likely to act out of frustration or boredom. Follow their lead, they aren’t developmentally ready to sit and enage for long periods of time.
✔ Strong relationships
Children who feel seen, known, and valued are more likely to cooperate and seek help appropriately. Praise them for all the good they do!
Connection is often the best behavior management tool we have.
In-the-Moment De-Escalation Tools🧠
When behaviors do happen (and they will), your response matters more than the consequence.
Stay calm first.
Children borrow our regulation. A calm adult helps a child regain control faster.
Validate the feeling, not the behavior.
“I see you’re really mad that playtime is over. It’s okay to feel mad, but it’s not okay to hit.”
Offer simple choices.
“Do you want to line up by yourself or hold my hand?”
Redirect when possible.
Especially with younger children, distraction and redirection can quickly shift behavior. This is where knowing the childs interest come in; what is therir go-to station in the classroom?
Use calm spaces, not punishment.
A quiet area to reset is about regulation, not isolation. This should be an area with a clear view for you the teacher, where 1-2 children can go and relax in a cozy setting with figets or books away from a busier station.
The goal is not to control children, but to teach them how to regain control themselves.
Teaching Skills, Not Just Stopping Behavior🎯
Long-term success comes from building skills, not just correcting actions.
Teach emotional vocabulary: happy, frustrated, disappointed, excited. Use charts like this!
Practice problem-solving during calm moments, like breathing exercises.
Use role-play and social stories to model appropriate responses
Notice and reinforce positive behaviors often
When children learn what to do instead of what not to do, behaviors improve naturally.
Knowing When to Ask for Support🤝
Some behaviors may need extra layers of support, and that’s okay.
Partner with families, involve your director, and seek guidance from specialists when needed. Early support can make a huge difference in a child’s long-term success and in your classroom environment. In Northeast Ohio, you can connect families with the following agencies for support: Help Me Grow (by County), the ECRC in Stark County, Summit DD, Ohio Early Intervention DCY, and Ohio Guidestone.
We are here to support and guide, not diagnose. Asking for help is not a weakness; it’s professional and proactive.
You Don’t Have to Do This Alone🌻
Supporting children through big emotions is meaningful work, and exhausting work. Burnout is real in early childhood education, especially when classrooms are short-staffed or routines are disrupted.
At Sunflower Childcare Substitutes, we believe that when educators are supported, children thrive. Having reliable substitute coverage allows teachers to take time off when needed, maintain ratios, and keep classrooms running smoothly, even on tough days.
To every educator reading this: Your patience, compassion, and commitment matter more than you know; and we are proud to support the incredible work you do every day.
